First of Many

I have purchased sun dresses in the past and because I have always been self conscious of my fatty arms, I have chosen to wear cardigans.  Regardless of the heat, I was subjecting myself to increased temperature simply because I was so concerned about strangers thinking I had a fat ugly arms.  Adam has tried to break me of this nasty habit for years to no avail.  I have simply ignored his pleadings because I didn't believe him when he told me that no one cared.

Over the last few days I have felt the heat of the Boise air.  I don't even want to get into the schematics of what happens when a person of my ponderous stature is exposed to excess heat.  I will however, sum it all up: I get sweaty and gross.  Adam and I were talking before going out and he once again began his case about me not putting on a cardigan to step out into 90 degree heat.  I listened and decided that perhaps he was right.  Why should I care what Joe Schmo thinks about my outfit?  Who the hell does he think he is exactly?  So I braved the farmer's market and Costco only to discover that yes indeed not one single person gave a crap about what I was or was not wearing.  No one came up to me and said, "hey chunkster, where is your issued cardigan that all fatties are required to wear?  You go back and put it on young lady."  I walked around at a much cooler temperature than I ever have before wearing a sun dress and suddenly I realized how lovely the concept of these dresses really were.  In fact, the cashier at the grocery store complimented my dress.  I felt so satisfied and in fact, we later went swimming and I chose to not put on my ugly basketball shorts to hide my thighs.

For a moment before I began the walk of shame into the water, I got nervous about what people might think; then I remembered what had happened previously in the day, I.E. nothing so I marched my butt on into the refreshing water.  Today I wore my workout clothes in public to ride around the greenbelt.  Adam snapped a shot of me cooling off and although my body is not close to perfect, I am happy.  It is ok to not be afraid of something as silly as chunky arms.  There are much worse things to be frightened over, like moths and butterflies.